Thursday, April 19, 2012

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No Shirt No Shoes No Service

I am thrilled to announce a major breakthrough for #6. He is totally and completely potty trained! Yay! He and Logan will be 4 in June, and I couldn't be happier about his progress. We do have a tiny little issue though. He's only potty trained if he's stark naked. As the school frowns upon sending naked children to class, this presents a problem. It's enough to drive me batty (Pappy, if you're reading this, I already know you're going to say it's a short drive...).

My #6 has sensory issues, as you all know. He doesn't like clothes, he is uber sensitive to sound, and he's a fairly picky eater. Nothing too cold, nothing too warm. But, y'all.... he totally knows how to use the potty! And this whole "If there is even a THREAD on my body, I won't do it!" thing is more than a little hiccup. On the other hand, Logan is still oblivious. He's capable, but has no control. He'll get there. I'm not overly concerned.

What to do, what to do? It's not as though I can go to his Para and say, "Hey.. so, can you take #6 to the restroom during the day and let him strip naked while you watch so he will use the toilet and you won't have to change him anymore?" Because let's face it, people. There's already hysteria in the school system about whether a female Para should be allowed to change a special needs male child.  I can just imagine her delight at the prospect of encouraging a student to strip naked. And heaven forbid another student be in the restroom while she encourages my child to take it all off. Giant warning bells, sirens, and flashing red lights in my brain screaming "Law suit! Law suit!". And also, I can see it now. "Oh yes, they call him The Streak....the fastest thing on two feet... Don't LOOK, Ethel!"

Oh, I know, I know! THIS is what should happen. Schools across the nation should install those buckets of awesome aquarium toilets in the restrooms. Seriously, kids would be BEGGING to take a bathroom break.. even mine, and he might even do it with his clothing on! So no learning would happen, because the restrooms would forever be full of kids watching the fishes. It's a small price to pay so the twinnies' Para won't have to change #6 anymore. Right? Right!

Probably not going to happen, I know. *sigh* But you have to admit, it was a brilliant idea. And, speaking of brilliant ideas, I'm just about out of them. So, my super intelligent readers, whatcha got? We have tried the "Sink the cheerio" game. He hadda do it naked. We have tried bribery. Still nude. Help?

Images from the Google images, video from Youtube

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