Let us remember that until this school year started, the twinnie monsterlettes had never, ever... not even ONCE, been in a grocery store, a playland, a super Wally World, or a Buy Your Things In Ridiculously Huge Sizes store. When they started school, we slowly, SLOWLY started taking them out to experience things. There was the disastrous trip to see Happy Feet 2 at the movie theater, the trip to Mickey D's playland, a trip to Super Wally World (where I shamelessly bribed them with Hot Wheels). But the grocery store... that never gets old. We can always count on new and exciting things happening there.
- The twinnies may wear sunglasses inside, because the lights are too bright, or they are scary.
- We touch everything. I'm not joking. Everything.
- We have to debate whether bread with a red bag is better or bread with a white bag is better, because the wrong kind of bag... yeah. We can't even think about such a tragedy. And we don't care what flavor it is, as long as the bag is the right color. Until we get home, that is...
- We can never go when the hot deli is open. The aroma of frying chicken, the sizzle of the oil, the noise associated with the exhaust fan above the fryers, is more than the twinnies can tolerate.
- We must always get juice boxes, a certain brand, a certain color, and if they ever go out of stock, I'm running away and joining the circus.
- We start in the produce section and finish with the meat section.
- It is better to have to maneuver two full size shopping carts with twins in the seats through tiny aisles, than to stand in the cart bay for an hour having heart palpitations because there is only one child sized cart available, your list is three miles long, and both the twinnies want to push a cart.
- It is NOT a sin to bribe the twinnies with a lolly or a juice box while shopping if it keeps the screaming from happening.
- If watermelons are on sale, and there is a cart full of them in the middle of everything because that's good advertising, #6 will harass you for half an hour until you give in and pick one out. Just give in immediately. It's easier.
- If the twinnies are not allowed to pretend they are driving in NASCAR with the carts, there will be all manner of crankiness.
- Never, ever, EVER, no matter what you do, forget the bologna and American cheese. It does not matter if there is screaming. It does not matter if someone needs a change. Do. Not. Forget. The. Bologna. And. Cheese!!!!
- The twinnies will touch every electronic button, product, magazine, and pack of gum available in the checkout line if they are taken out of the grocery cart prematurely. No, I really didn't want to use a credit card to pay. Sorry about that. Oops. No, I don't want cash back. Sorry again. Wait, I didn't want 30 lighters! (while giving #6 the hairy eyeball and putting aforementioned lighters back)
Images in this post from the Google images.