Sunday, February 6, 2011

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Where are the lines?

Every once in a while I'm asked to contribute an article about SPD or autism or food allergies. Sometimes I'm asked to contribute in other ways, such as being a guest at a twitter party, joining a group of bloggers on a particular subject, or other similar things. It puts me in a predicament. For me, it's difficult to think of only one piece of Logan and dedicate every thought to that one thing, instead of Logan as a whole.

I don't mean that in any sort of a bad way. I just have difficulty breaking Logan down into pieces, when the reality is that we live and love Logan as a whole, not just parts. So, when someone says, for example, "Will you write about your experiences with autism?" it really throws me for a loop. I have to sit down and make a concentrated effort to separate all the autism pieces of life out and think about them, and then write. Is that odd?

I don't think of Logan in pieces. Logan is just..... Logan. I wouldn't trade any part of him for something else. The diet is a hassle. A really, really BIG hassle. But we know that this is what Logan needs, and we know how much better he does when he's on it, so that's part of Monster House life. We know that he needs to sit on a vibrating chair pad sometimes when he is out of sorts.  Yesterday, the Daddy looked at "The Great Big Book of Bugs" with him for ten minutes while he was sitting on the chair pad wearing a blue knitted ski hat.  He started out fidgety and aggressive. Ten minutes later, he was docile and happy and all Chatty Cathy about bugs.

Autism? Yes. Hand flapping. We're seeing more and more of that. He's a stickler for things being done a certain way, and heaven help anyone who deviates from the plan. Meltdowns, certainly. The likes of which have never before been seen at the Monster House. He can't stand it when someone says "yeah". He will go up to that person, agitated, and say "Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes..." until they correct themselves and say "Yes. Sorry Logan."

But... dedicate an entire article to one of these things? I have a very hard time doing that. I literally have to walk around and take notes for a while. Am I the only one? It always seems to me that "other parents" can list things at the drop of a hat. I can't. He's just Logan. My tiny little child that thinks I'm his everything.  He's snuggly. He has eye contact. He is SMART. He picks up things just by watching.. he doesn't explore like a "normal" 2 year old. He watches. We play "for" him. We show him how things work. We initiate running, jumping, and taking chances. Then he will follow suit. But only if someone else does it first.

So where are the lines?? The lines between SPD, autism, and the "normal" behavior of a two year old? Anyone have answers for me?


This side of Typical said...

Your boy sounds alot like mine, diet aside (we tried it for a while with no results). When i have friends with NT kids ask me about Autism and what i deal with, I tell them that what i deal with is about 85% of what they deal with, with differing levels of intensity. That other 15% sometimes takes center stage and sometimes is barely noticeable. It's just a day to day thing. I don't think there are really "lines"--each kid is a kid, with his/her needs. To me the lines are pretty "fuzzy", and yeah, this is what we do--we parent our WHOLE child, not just the Autism part.

Amy @ mommetime said...

I have no answers! But I can oldest is the same way when it comes to doing something the 'right' way. In the beginning it drove me crazy but now we just go with the flow and it works out so much better than trying to get her to 'be' a certain way. I have a difficult time breaking it down to 'one' of anything with both of my kids because they have so many different characteristics that it is difficult to just focus on one.

Anonymous said...

You made me think...Yes, I do post about some of my son's differences but I think I'm doing it in a way that talks about who he is overall. And really how can we not talk about who our children are without giving the context of the close up?

Btw, my son too loves the Great Big Book of Bugs although many pages have been mauled and torn...a classic!

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