Tuesday, November 29, 2011

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You Might Be An Autism Parent If...

There's a popular hashtag floating around twitter these days called #youmightbeanautismparentif . And, I can see the point. I really can. It's meant to be a source of unity, of understanding, of special needs parents coming together, and realizing that they are not the only ones who go through some of the situations our special needs children bring to us. We are not alone. I love this part. And though I have not tweeted using the hashtag, I HAVE retweeted some truly moving statements.

And then.. there's the part of me that's a little bit upset about it. I have long maintained that though Logan is on the spectrum (and to be honest, we're learning that #6 very much is, as well), autism does not define us.  We were a family before diagnosis, we were parents before diagnosis, and we will continue to be a family forever after. It does not matter what comes our way in life. We are parents, and a family, ALWAYS.

So, when I read things like this it makes me sad. I just can't help it. There is so much in this thread that is so. freaking. great. and tweets like these bring down the whole thing.
 Ur child is non verbal, and when you hear other autistic kids speak, u wonder if you drew a short straw :/

 you know your nephew is perfect. But you still wish for a cure. 

I'm regretting that we painted my son's room navy blue...he won't stop picking off the paint. Looks awful now. 

 you worry about the toll caring for your child 24hrs a day FOREVER will have on your marriage

 your conversations with your spouse always start with "how's (asd) child doing?" but not your NT child

 you get REALLY annoyed at the terrible parenting skills of those with 'normal' children after all your training

 you cracked a front tooth when you clenched your teeth to avoid yelling at your kid who was on your last nerve

So.Though I won't participate in #youmightbeanautismparentif , please know that my support is with you. And if ever I can help by listening, emailing,  conversing via phone or whatever, y'all please don't hesitate. I just have a hard time. Because really, what about
#youmightbeatoddlerparentif  or
#youmightbeateenparentif  or
#youmightbeaparentofadramaqueenif  or

I can't do it. I have children. Because of this, I am a parent. A mother. I feel no need to further define my role based on diagnosis, because all of my children are equally important. And all of my children provide ample cause for frustration, elation, sadness, and pride. Not just Logan. Judge me if you must. But that's where I stand.
image of parent and child holding hands from the Google images

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